[Thanks Paul GS (the shoephone guy)]

Disappointingly, it doesn't really lend itself to an amusing pun.

Proving that there’s never too many ways to do something in a ridiculous manner, and following renditions in toast and in Post-It Notes, attention-seeking promotional types at a Sydney coffee festival have elected to recreate DaVinci’s famous portrait of the wife of a Florentian silk merchant through the medium of lots of little cups of coffee.

“The Mona Lisa has been reproduced so many times in so many different mediums but, as far as we know, never out of coffee.”

Ignorant pillocks.

Everyone knows that the plural of “medium” is “media”.

[The Telegraph, via Derren Brown's Blog]

The first Star Wars film (yes, as in the one released in 1977 – it’s bloody well called “Star Wars”, not “A New Hope”) has been divided up into segments of 15 seconds, and put out for re-shooting by volunteers.  Once all 470ish segments have been filmed, presumably we’ll be able to watch the thing in its reassembled entirity and marvel at the variety & inginuety of the human race, set against the backdrop of a film we’ve all seen so many times that the fact we can’t make sense of any of the visuals or sound in this version fairly well irrelevant.

Hooray for democratic-yet-creative wastes of time.  But what’s the bet that nearly 500 distributed nerds don’t make as big a cockup of it as George Lucas can.

Click here to view the embedded video.

Following in the footsteps of Wilkinson Sword’s ladygarden advice.  One wonders what sort of response King Of Shaves is going to come up with.

(One would assume that by the time the lad’s considering trimming that area of the anatomy, there’s little point in offering guidance for the side-effects of applying moisturiser to it.)

[via TheInquisitr]

Click here to view the embedded video.

So anyway, the GOOD news is that now – finally – thanks to the magic of Etsy.com it’s possible to acquire handmade merchandise to celebrate the work of Big Jim, in mug form.

He was a former tight-end for the Kansas City Chiefs, don't you know...

By god if they weren’t US$125 a piece I’d have already ordered 4 for myself, plus another half dozen as Christmas presents.

1) Overheard in New York – of all of the “overheard in” sites listing snippets of other peoples’ conversations, this is the one which reliably comes up with the best self-contained stuff that isn’t just Carry-on style double-entendre.

Middle-aged woman: Tradition brings us all together and makes us feel close.
Twentysomething woman: That’s not the tradition; it’s the Jack Daniels.

Older woman: Excuse me, miss?
Younger woman: Yeah?
Older woman: Your veil, your burqa is very beautiful. I didn’t know your people were allowed to wear it in bright colors.
Younger woman: It’s not a burqa, it’s a poncho. I’m Jewish. It’s for the rain. I got it at TJ Maxx.

Cop, taking report of stolen car: Ok, what was the color, make and model?
Metro Guy: It’s cranberry and…
Cop: Cranberry’s something you eat, son, your car was red.

Sassy flight attendant: In the event of a loss of cabin pressure, oxygen masks will be released from the overhead above your seat. After the screaming subsides, please place the oxygen mask around your nose and mouth. If you are traveling with a child or an adult who is acting like a child, place your mask on first before attempting to help put theirs on.

And soforth.

2) Texts from last night – particularly, the bad nights/worst nights section.  Not something you’d let your grandmother read.

(570): If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.

There’s no witty conclusion to this – it was just kinda interesting.

Business cards made out of meat are all well & good in theory, but in practice we all know how risky that’s going to be when you’re stumbling home on a Friday night and would ordinarily be contemplating a kebab.  Because nothing’s more refreshing than meat that’s been in your wallet for a week.

(* Note: have just noticed that on the site offering the cards that they’ve already made the Patrick Bateman gag.  Colour me derivative.)

It doesn’t look like all the properties are simply for sale – there’s investment opportunity aplenty as well:

This Atlas F site in the Adironback Park is already under development by Australian owner, seeking free-spirited, compatible partner/investor for further development into a unique (M.A.S.H. theme) entertainment venue suitable for dance parties and other profitable commercial uses.

Not an opportunity to be missed, folks: it’ll be New York’s premier M.A.S.H. themed underground entertainment venue.

Now all we need to do is sort out how to say “Where is the frog throwing contest?”, and we can all pack up & go home.

[well spotted, Amie]