All the best stories start this way:
Four women, including the man’s wife, in court after allegedly imprisoning their former lover and supergluing his genitals to his stomach.
Got to love the closure though:
The man got free from the bed by chewing through one of his bindings, went outside and borrowed a telephone from the motel owner to call police.
Chewing through his bindings. With his dick stuck to his stomach. Rock and roll.